PDF Download Best Friends, Occasional Enemies: The Lighter Side of Life as a Mother and Daughter, by Lisa Scottoline, Francesca Serritella
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From the New York Times bestselling writing team comes a hilarious new collection of essays that observe life from a mother/daughter perspective
New York Times bestselling author Lisa Scottoline and her daughter Francesca Serritella are the best of friends--99.9% of the time. They're number one on each other's speed dial and they tell each other everything--well, almost everything. They share shoes and clothes--except one very special green jacket, which almost caused a catfight.
In other words, they're just like every mother and daughter in the world. Best friends, and occasional enemies. Now they're dishing about it all--their lives, their relationship, and their carb count.
Inspired by their weekly column, "Chick Wit" for The Philadelphia Inquirer, this book is one you'll have to put down--just to stop laughing.
Lisa on Being a Mom - Motherhood has no expiration date. Francesca lives in the city, and I worry about her all the time. My daughter moved out, so why am I still lactating?
Francesca on Being a Daughter - My mother is always right. Just ask her.
Lisa on Things Every Daughter Should Know - Your mother is always thinking about you, but that's not creepy. Your mother will never forget who did you dirty in the sixth grade, for which you can thank her. And your mother will never stop asking you if you need to go to the bathroom, before you leave the house. Well, do you?
Francesca on Closet Wars - My mom is a great dresser. Mostly because she's wearing my clothes.
Lisa on Aging Gracefully - My sex drive is in reverse, I have more whiskers than my cat, and my estrogen replacement is tequila.
Francesca on Apartment Living - When I saw a mouse, the first person I called was Mom. She told me to call my super, but I felt bad bothering him. I hate to bother people. But I love to bother my mother.
- Sales Rank: #1459709 in Books
- Brand: Brand: St. Martin's Press
- Published on: 2011-11-22
- Released on: 2011-11-22
- Original language: English
- Number of items: 1
- Dimensions: 8.54" h x 1.10" w x 5.92" l, .80 pounds
- Binding: Hardcover
- 288 pages
- First Edition Book
Review
Feels like one big gabfest with your best girlfriends, whatever their age. The tell-all twosome have yet again opened their hearts and homes, cooking up a huge helping of laughs, sprinkled with a few tears and a dash of motherly love--and it all goes down deliciously. (Booklist)
[A] witty and sweet return to the ins and outs of life in this sometimes kooky, always smart and funny, family. (Publishers Weekly)
Black-and-white family photographs lend a homey feel to the experience, which culminates in a reminder to mothers and daughters that friendship between them can last a lifetime. A treat for fans of observational humor.
About the Author
LISA SCOTTOLINE is the New York Times bestselling and Edgar-Award winning author of eighteen novels. She has 25 million copies of her books in print in the United States, and she has been published in twenty-five countries. She is currently serving as the President of the Mystery Writers of America. She lives in Philadelphia with an array of disobedient pets.
FRANCESCA SCOTTOLINE SERRITELLA graduated cum laude from Harvard University, where she won the Thomas Temple Hoopes Prize, the Le Baron Russell Briggs Fiction Prize, and the Charles Edmund Horman Prize for her creative writing. She is working on a novel, and she lives in New York with only one dog, so far.
Excerpt. © Reprinted by permission. All rights reserved.
BEST FRIENDS, OCCASIONAL ENEMIES (Chapter 1)
The Occasional Enemies Part
By Lisa
Daughter Francesca and I are very close, but that doesn’t mean we don’t fight.
On the contrary, it means we do.
So if you’re currently fighting with your daughter, or merely fussing from time to time, you’ve come to the right place.
Let’s start with the notion that the no-fighting model isn’t the best for mother-daughter relations. I know so many women who feel bad, guilty, or inferior because they fight with their daughters, and they needn’t. To them, and to you, I say, flip it.
What?
Flip that notion on its head. If you fight with your daughter, you raised her to think independently from you, and to voice her own views.
Yay!
You’re a great mother. Know why?
Because the world doesn’t reward the timid. Especially if they have ovaries.
In my opinion, conflict between mother and daughter is normal and good. Not only that, it’s love. I say this not as a social scientist, which I’m not, but as a real-life mother, which I so am. So if your daughter is fighting with you, here’s the good and bad news:
The good news is you raised her right.
The bad is you have a headache.
Forever.
Just kidding.
Francesca and I are best friends, but at times, we’re at odds. Enemies, only momentarily. Like most mothers and daughters, we’re so attuned to each other’s words and gestures that even the arching of an eyebrow can convey deep meaning.
If somebody plucks, we’re in trouble.
We never have really huge fights, but we have car rides to New York that can feel as if they last cross-country.
Wars of words.
We go on and on, each replying to the other, swept along in a girl vortex of words, during which we parse every nuance of every syllable, with special attention to tone.
Tone is the kryptonite of mother-daughter relationships.
As in, “I don’t like your tone.”
Also, “Don’t use that tone with me.”
And the ever-popular, “It wasn’t what you said, it was your tone.”
It was ever thus. Francesca and I got along great from the time she came out of the egg, and I used to tell her that she wasn’t allowed to whine, but she could argue with me. In other words, make her case for whatever she wanted.
Never mind that she was three at the time.
Oddly, this turned out great. She was the Perry Mason of toddlers, and more often than not, she was right. Or she felt completely heard, which was often enough for kiddie satisfaction. She argued for punch balls from the gift shop at the zoo, dessert before dinner if she ate all her dinner, and the wearing of Cinderella outfits on an almost daily basis, complete with tiara.
What girl doesn’t want a tiara?
Another thing I did when she was little was to let her vent. I had no idea how I came upon this idea, but I used to give her the chance to say anything she wanted to me, without interruption, for a full minute.
And I mean, anything.
She was even permitted to curse at me, though she didn’t know any profanity at that age. It got only as rude as “butt face.”
Ouch?
She’s still permitted to argue with me and vent her anger. And she accords me the same permission. Even though we’re writing books together and we adore each other, we can still get mad at each other. And that valve releases the pressure from the combustible engine that is the mother-daughter relationship.
It’s just hot air, anyway.
Bottom line, we’re close, so we fight, and the converse is also true. The conflict strengthens us, because it’s honesty, hard-earned.
And the more honest we are with each other, the closer we are. You’ll see exactly what I mean, in the pages that follow.
So enjoy.
And watch your tone.
BEST FRIENDS, OCCASIONAL ENEMIES. Copyright 2011 by Smart Blonde, LLC, and Francesca Scottoline Serritella.
Most helpful customer reviews
11 of 12 people found the following review helpful.
Lisa (and Francesca) Delight Once Again
By Cat
I own the previous two books of Lisa's "adventures", and now this one, and all have been delightful reads. If you are a fan of Lisa's Sunday newspaper column, you know what I mean. Lisa, and Francesca, write about the things that happen to most women but we are embarrassed or reluctant to talk about. Not so Lisa and daughter...and in doing so, they make us feel that they're okay and we're okay just as we are, flaws, mistakes and everything in between. The book also contains some poignant stories that will tug at your heartstrings because we can all relate, such as losing a beloved pet. No matter what your age, you will enjoy this book.
2 of 2 people found the following review helpful.
Looking at Serious Issues in a Humorous Way
By Nancy
Everyone knows Lisa's courtroom thrillers but she is also an essayist and writes for the Philadelphia Enquirer. Once a year, she and her daughter Francesca publish a book of their essays and every year I wait patiently for the next installment. They are real life stories of mother and daughter and I cannot help but to laugh my way through them.
Growing up is not easy, whether you are the mother or daughter, but the combinations of parent/child, mother/daughter, granddaughter/grandmother, each have their insights and pitfalls. Lisa appears to be the meat that holds these sandwiches together and her humorous insight is bother endearing and laugh aloud funny.
I love checking in with this mother daughter team to relive what I have already been through or to prepare for the future challenges that I know I will face with an adult child. I would not say that Francesca is dependent on her mother, more along the lines that Lisa is dependent on her mature responsible child to help her through the normal tasks that come up - like reading boxes and ingredients or when to call the vet or tree trimming company.
This book takes on serious issues too, but in a humorous way. Life is challenging and if you are lucky enough to have a loving family that accepts your foibles, then you are all the better off because of it.
1 of 1 people found the following review helpful.
Humor fell flat for me
By EpicFehlReader
I've tried to read a few of Scottoline's mysteries in the past -- and I know she is well loved by many readers of that genre -- but I've always struggled getting into her books. I figured I would try this one because it was non-fiction, allowing me to see a different side to her, and I figured there might be some laughs here to share with my own mother. I don't know... the humor just struck me as pretty forced. I don't think I honestly laughed once. In fact, some parts had me really cringing and thinking it would be difficult for me to like Lisa as a person. Much of my reading of this just had me thinking "#whitepeopleproblems".
For one thing, she laughingly writes about talking with her daughter while clipping her toenails in the kitchen. Do you not serve / prepare food in there, woman?! Yuck! SO grossed out by that! But that wasn't the biggie for me. The big issue for me is how she talks about how she speaks to customer service reps & retail staff -- calling a credit card company bitching about her APR (which she could have easily been aware of had she looked at her paperwork, I'm sure) busting out the word "usurious" -- that just struck me as pretentious right there -- or how she seems to take pride in debasing holiday staff with harshly sarcastic comments when they are honestly just doing their job. I feel for these workers because I've had those jobs and I've had customers much like the way Lisa describes herself in these situations -- though she sees nothing wrong with how she talks to them. It's more of a "Who's with me!" tone. Not me, Lisa, not me.
It wasn't all a loss for me though, I did enjoy the stories about their pets (heartbreaking though they were) -- their reminisces about their retrievers and Francesca's horse. The part about their Golden, Angie is especially a heartstrings-tugger. I also enjoyed Francesca's memories of first experiencing a lunar eclipse and Lisa's story about returning to Italy to the town where her ancestors originated from, Ascoli-Piceno.
Solid fans of Lisa's work will probably appreciate this, but it was a no for me.
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